Making Plans

I was reading My Utmost for his Highest this evening and came across a very interesting discussion. Here are a few key sentences that caught my attention:

"One of the most difficult questions to answer in Christian work is 'What do you expect to do?' You don't know what you are going to do. The only thing you know is that God knows what he is doing."

"Have you been asking God what he is going to do? He will never tell you. God does not tell you what he is going to do--he reveals to you who he is."

And later: "Let the attitude of your life be a continual willingness to 'go out' in dependence upon God and you life will have a sacred and inexpressible charm about it that is very satisfying to Jesus."

So what is the balance between trusting God and having a plan? A long time ago when I first started out in ministry all I did was trust God. I had no expectations. Every day was an adventure and great things happened. I saw miracles and knew that God was present. But it was really chaotic at the same time. I felt like I was a wandering prophet, constantly asking God what was going on.

And then people started asking me for my plan. What are my goals? What do I hope to accomplish? What is my strategy and do I have it drawn up in a pretty little folder that I can give out to supporters? The pressure got to me. I needed to have a strategy. Ducks needed to be lined up. My answer of trusting God wasn't enough... and honestly, I wanted a plan, something measurable that I could gauge my success and failure by, something that pointed towards the future that I could have confidence in. 

There's a time to sow seeds and plan for the harvest. There's a time to wait for a plan and there's a time to strike out in faith.

But where is that line? Is it supposed to be a balance between the two? Does one out-weigh the other? I feel like I'm drowning in plan-making. Everything has to be thought out, everything has to measure to something. What is the plan, you say? I haven't a clue! But answers are required, schedules need to be filled, work needs to be done. But I still don't have a clue.

Maybe what I'm good at isn't coming up with a two, five or ten year plan; maybe it's living day to day in faith and trusting that God who knows more that I could ever imagine has the plan.

Maybe I'm doomed to live a chaotic life that zigzags across ministries, interests, hobbies, plans, goals, countries and strategies.

Maybe there isn't supposed to be one all encompassing reason for any of it... other than the simple strategy of getting to know God better.

And honestly, I shouldn't let anything get into the way of me getting to know God better.