Philosophy #3
I shall be an honest, authentic person.

I'm tired of double standards. I'm tired of my own double standards most of all. I tell people I'm a Christian, I tell people that I would do anything for Jesus... but when it comes down to it, my anything is full of exceptions. God, sure, I'll tithe, but please don't make me look silly in front of a large group of people. I'm willing, but only to an extent. That allows me to experience and know God only to an extent.

As Christians, we go on and on about submitting to authority, to the law, to our teachers, parents, whoever. So to what extent am I supposed to submit? How deep does this authenticity in me run? Okay, so I don't break the law by murdering anyone, but I'll break the speed limit. I guess this is a social exception to the law... until I see those flashing lights. I'll submit to my boss in my actions, but I'll still tear him apart verbally in front of my co-workers. I'll put up with the loser in our group and be nice to them and all, but secretly wish the earth would swallow them up one morning. Honest and authentic? Hmm.

I don't want to be a walking contradiction anymore. I respect people who take God seriously enough to allow him influence in every part of their lives, who are not ashamed to do things like put a Christian bumper sticker on their car because they are willing to be a reflection of Jesus in their driving (gasp). I don't want to compete bitterly with the church next door for attendees. (Who cares! As long as people are learning and growing in Christ that's what matters, right?) I don't want to pretend stealing songs and software off the internet is okay.

It's the hardest thing ever to do, to be a reflection of Christ's holiness in every aspect of life. It means I have to care about things that are hard to care about, it means I have to contend with the sickness, dirtiness and evil in the world. It means I can't take the easy road, cut corners or cheat. It means I have to walk through my life with an honest, authentic broken heart. But I'm guessing that's exactly what Jesus did.