Explody Head Syndrome

I've been having some serious pain in my head over the past few days. Initially I thought it was due to my brain rebelling from insane amount of info I've been trying to cram into it at EMT school but now I realize it may be something more sinister.

As usual WebMD tells me I have a cancer (watch this video if you don't understand what I mean) but I personally think it's a sinus thing.

Today at our work conference it hit an all time... low? high? um... an all time horrible. Here's what I looked like:

(thank you hyperboleandahalf)

I was curled up in the corner twitching and drooling, trying to concentrate on these intense conversations we're having about taking over the world but instead all I could focus on was how my brain was trying to squeeze out my eyes. I was on the verge of tears.

One of my co-workers suggested that I go lay down but I grimaced and said no thanks because really, when you're dying of Explody Head Syndrome the worst thing to do is go be by yourself where you have nothing but your pain to keep you company. I wanted DISTRACTION. Maybe thriller of a movie would have done it but I was at work and there was no movie in sight. I did take a bunch of pain killers which eventually dulled my senses and turned my co-workers into big fuzzy aliens with four arms and six legs. At which point I decided a nap was probably a good idea.

The pain is mostly gone now... but I can still feel it lurking in my head ready to pounce on my eyeballs at any moment. I really have to figure out a strategy to kill this thing. I don't think my co-workers would appreciate watching this happen before their eyes: