I have a massive headache. It's probably not a good time to write anything that makes sense but I'm going to anyway.

I am one of the most undisciplined slackers I know. People around me may disagree with me, but it's true. I just hide it well. I'm currently surrounded by English midterms that desperately need grading. I have to compile grades for mid semester reports and I should prepare for Monday, my busiest day of class. But what have I done all day?

Drag my feet. Think of a thousand other things I want to do. Check my email and blog and everyone else's blog again and again and again. Daydream. Grab some coffee. Serf the web. Play the piano.

I have accomplished nothing. I feel so apathetic.

If I'm going to procrastinate I might as well do something I'm actually interested in but I can't. Sometimes I wonder why the gene that makes a person semi-driven and purposeful skipped over me. There are days when I have to fight so hard to do anything. It's a plague and I'm tired of it.

Is everyone like this? Does everyone have days that they just don't have the drive to invest themselves in their work?

This feeling is ruining me. It's sucking me down a vortex of death. I'm afraid that by the time I get out of this I'll be so behind with things that I'll never be able to get caught up. I'm also worried that my students will discover that their teacher is actually an undercover lazy brain. They might already know.